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[20 Jun 2006|01:18pm] |
i don't know if it's somethin that I'M doin, but it seems like a lot of chics try to prove their 'hardness' in front of me. instead of showin me the same respect that they would show a male standing next to me, most females will change their tone to a higher notch, their body language to defensive, and their smile turns nonexistant.
why are some females like that?
i know it ain't always me because i'll give somebody a simple 'how you doin' and i get back an 'OH I'M DOIN FINE!'. is all of that extra attitude really necessary?
no wonder i got no girlfriends, 80% of us are crazy insecure bitches.
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[19 Jun 2006|11:03pm] |
i want to go to MIAMI.
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| not too sharp? |
[15 Jun 2006|06:48pm] |
homegirl is selling a $1.00 off coupon to Trade Secret for $0.99 and claims shipping is $5.99.
let me put this one under [ebays most wanted]
and what the hell is runnin through britney's mind changing her baby's diaper on the floor at Victoria's Secret. i can't stop laughing!!
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| it still hurts though. |
[13 Jun 2006|11:46pm] |
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music |
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i expected beyonce's new hit to be better. |
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i wish everything would just turn okay. i don't have a positive outlook on much in my life now'a'days.
oh yea, and the fact that my boyfriend's mother doesn't like me because i don't speak spanish, does not help the situation. I find her to be ignorant and close-minded, but i still gotta respect her because she's his mom. she got some nerve though, that's like me inviting her over to my house but sayin "oh wait, you have to learn to speak arabic or we won't accept you".
what kind of old school racist shit is this?
my boyfriend's on my side, but it still hurts. i was nothing but nice to that woman, i drove her and her husband to brooklyn as a favor! but she seems to forget all the shit i've done for her and her son. i guess she's the type of Rican who doesn't appreciate shit people do for her.
i'm done with tryin to impress people.
i am who i am. accept it or don't.
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| why i respect her. |
[11 Jun 2006|12:35am] |
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'I think each person has the right to express themselves the way they wish. That’s what I like about this country: the right to freedom. But for me, there is a fine line between being sensual and sexual. From the N to the X, there are, like, 10 or 11 letters, a pretty long distance, and I want to stay this side, close to the N.'
Shakira in Blender magazine
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[06 Jun 2006|02:38pm] |
her words were malicious
and made pressure like a fist
her thoughts were inhumane
the crazy called her insane
mind set in disbelief
never experienced relief
paranoia overcomes her
while anger seems to run her
self-control ain't an option
only knowin' how to stop it
bullets just pause her
sharp knives dispise her
lightening introduces her
as if the clouds produced her
preperation is inadequate
because God is her affiliate.
a.j.k.
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| genius. |
[03 Jun 2006|08:07pm] |
"Beef is not what these famous niggas do on the mic
Beef is what George Bush would do in a fight
Yeah, beef is not what Ja said to 50
Beef is more than Irv not bein here with me
When a soldier ends his life with his own gun
Beef is tryin' to figure out what to tell his son
Beef is oil prices and geopolitics
Beef is Iraq, the West Bank, and Gaza Strip
Some beef is big and some beef is small
But what y'all call beef is not beef at all
Beef is real life happenin' everyday
And it's realer than them songs that you get at Kay Slay"
mos def
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[03 Jun 2006|12:00am] |
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I'm cleaning out my friend's list. If you read my journal then comment, if you don't give a shit then don't.
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[31 May 2006|10:57pm] |
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music |
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papoose - i put in work |
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i just downloaded a trial version of paint shop pro and i only got 30 days to use the shit up. anybody know any fly tricks?
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| [7 questions] |
[27 May 2006|12:17am] |
why is everybody on myspace's dick?
why is there no good music out?
why does it seem like everybody and they cousin is pregnant?
why can't i ever win anything?
why is christina milian sweatin' nick cannon? ain't he dorky?
what makes letoya luckett think she can compete with beyonce?
did the rest of the world see jimmy kimmel [live] get bit by a snake?
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[24 May 2006|10:20am] |
school is driving me crazy. i can't take it anymore. i don't have any cash and I need $600 to take two summer classes [which i got no motivation to take] because i have to transer the credits to my university to be eligible for financial aid.
i attempted to take one and they pulled me out the class because my credit card got declined. AHHHHHHHHH! i took the last spot so the class MUST be full by now. they ain't have to play me like that. i had the cash so i would of sent them a money order right away.
sometimes i feel like i try and try and try but somebody up there feels i'm not tryin hard enough so they stop everything. take what i've given. and leave me cryin' back at square one.
i got no motivation for education no more. this stress got me makin stupid decisions. it would help if i had someone to talk to. a fuckin counsler or a friend, but no one get's it.
i'm 2 inches away from saying fuck everything.
i know it's supposed to be this hard but i don't feel like i'm up for the challenge anymore.
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[17 May 2006|11:20pm] |
is it true that christina milian has a ho tape out?
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| Shit to make you feel shit. |
[16 May 2006|03:57pm] |
I had a dream that I took a bullet for my sister. Kinda had me shook.
I was watching the news the other day and an 18 year girl got shot for walkin down the street with her friends from school, and lookin at some men a second longer than a glance. Her and her friends turned around to run and one of the guys fired 2 shots at her back.
What kind of shit is that? That happened in the Bronx, but it seems like the same dumb shit that would gown down in my city.
Lately cops have been findin bodies in backyards and inside of cars on a daily basis. The fuck is happening? Allentown was never this bad.
There are to many ignorant ma'fuckers in this city. Wish I could get up out of here.
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| Where my Ahmed's at? |
[26 Apr 2006|12:05pm] |
This summer, I wanna go into modeling. I'm not sayin I'm gonna drop out of college and pursue it like I'm gonna be the next Tyra, but I just wanna give it a try and see how far I can go with it. Why not you know? First things first, I gotta whoop my ass into real good shape. I don't look like I'm out of shape, but I know I am. I'll run up about 5 stairs and start huffin and puffin like I ran a mile. If I was tall enough, I would try out for America's Next Top Model. I was thinkin' I can walk up in the place wearin' some high heels that will make me 'look' like I'm tall enough. And when I have to take them off..."oh snap i done shrunk!"
There aren't many famous Arab-Americans in the media today, who are known for doing something positive. The only attention that Middle Eastern's are getting are terrorist-wise. Just wait till the movie 'Flight 93' comes out, people are gonna be hatin' on us all over again. I don't wanna have to hire 6 kids like they my own and walk up into a theater actin' Rican. I wanna represent what I really am! (okay mom?) But it's hard to do when I don't even got any Arab-American role models to look up too and say "I wanna be like that!". Instead, my role models are even Hispanic.
They say there's no such thing as bad publicity. All my arabs know, this sure as hell ain't true.
"paper can't change a man's aura, but it can feed a man's daughter." -common
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[14 Apr 2006|02:00pm] |
1. Have you ever ridden a camel?
no, but i feel obligated to bein from the desert.
2. When you are outside, what does the horizon look like?
polluted.
3. Who is the last person to leave you a message?
my hubby.
4. How many hours did you sleep last night?
maybe 8 or so? i slept well.
5. Chocolate: take it or leave it?
take it and eat it =)
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urban_focus's journal
